Joke 3

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Happy song 4

Well it is just fun thinking about Stig from Top Gear here. Some say:
he’s wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...
Some say that his heart ticks like a watch, and that he’s confused by stairs...
Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and that his crash helmet is modelled on Britney Spears’ head...
Some say he's banned from the town of Chichester...
Some say his scrotum has its own small gravity field...
All we know is that he is...The STIG.

Text 1

Sometimes we feel stranded.
Sometimes we want to get out, fly away, be free of all the responsibilities! But no, we can’t, parents, children, wife, job, bills…we just can’t do it. And you know what?
I just don’t care, a fact is that I feel terrible if I have no responsibilities because I am a human and my behaviour is what makes me different from animals, so stick to your duties! Stick to them like a bloody leech and enjoy the freedom in the end: When your family go happy, when you pay the last instalment!
Enjoy the pain, like a Spetsnaz. Then you will know how it is good to be pain free! Hope for a better future.

Joke 2

Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect desert camping and riding trip.
Two days before the group is to leave Rob's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.
Rob's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do?
Two days later the three get to the camping site only to find Rob sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and supper cooking on the fire.
"Dang man, how long you been here and how did you talk your wife into letting you go?"
"Well, I've been here since yesterday. Yesterday evening I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and said 'guess who'?"
I pulled her hands off and she was wearing a brand new see through nightie. She took my hand and took me to our bedroom. The room had two dozen candles and rose pedals all over. She had on the bed, handcuffs and ropes! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed and I did. And then she said, "now, you can do what ever you want."
So here I am.

Happy song 3

According to the movie, this song was written after a fight between Ray and his lead backup singer with which he was having an affair with.

Happy song 2

2 Minutes. Song 2.
A mockery of the grunge scene at the time. The cameras, the Mickey Mouse Damon shirt, or maybe just a "first trip in a plane Every noise and every bump is terrifying:

/I got my head shaked
By a jumbo jet
It wasn't easy
But nothing is
No!

I think the next bit is him hearing the engins and feeling the terror (pins and needles) of something happening. Who knows maybe he was on a plane that had engine trouble (heavy metal) when he was younger:

"When I feel heavy metal
And I'm pins and I'm needles'

The next bit he's telling himself that everythings going to be alright and talking to the person in the neighboring seat to help keep calm.

'Well I lie and I'm easy
All of the time but I'm never sure
When I need you
Pleased to meet you'

I think the, "I got my head done when I was young" means that the whole thing is past tense and just him remembering it or telling a friend what happened.

Ultimately the, 'Woo hoo' is just the terror he feels every time the plane bumps and jostles. It also is probably exilerating to know he survived and to think back on it."

Happy song 1

A music about drug abuse. Everything said.
Nevertheless, Dexter once said that it's about how much they hate ska. They are just making fun of it.
What a good fun!